Monday, July 30, 2007
Disarray
By: Lifehouse
I've faced my demons
Wrestling these angels to the ground
And all that I could find
Was a thin line between
All the saints and villains
it was crossed in my own mind
Someday I'm gonna find it
Wish I knew what I was looking for
Inside the disarray (inside the disarray)
I woke up this morning
Don’t know where I’m going
But it’s alright
I wouldn't have it any other way
I’m struggling between the facts and fiction
I’m alone
But I'm alive
Everyone around me is trying to make a statement
Then there's me
I’m just trying to survive
Someday I'm gonna find it
Wish I knew what I was looking for
Inside the disarray (inside the disarray)
I woke up this morning
Don’t know where I’m going
But it’s alright
I wouldn't have it any other way
If this was any other day
I'd pretend to know where I stand
I just don’t know (just don’t know)
Someday I'm gonna find it
Wish I knew what I was looking for
Inside the disarray (inside the disarray)
I woke up this morning
Don’t know where I’m going
But it’s alright
I wouldn't have it any other way
Someday I will find it
Wish I knew what I was looking for
Inside the disarray (inside the disarray)
I woke up this morning
Don’t know where I’m going
But it’s alright
Hey, how was the bbq? I hope it went great and that the food
was awesome. I hope it was worth our friendship.
Stop deluding yourself. You know and I know that we are no
longer "close friends" or "good friends" to put it in your own
words.
words written on the fallen leaf
9:38 PM
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Why can't people who pretend that they are my good friends or trying to show off to people that they are close to me just stay away from my blog, or even my life?
Is our friendship a facade that I'm too tired to put up anymore?
words written on the fallen leaf
8:03 PM
You Are a Brownie
|
Decadent and intense, you aren't for the weakhearted.
Those who can deal with your strong flavor find out how sweet you really are.
|
The Part of You That No One Sees
|
You are passionate, romantic, and emotional.
You put love first in your life, even though you have often been disappointed by it.
You expect to be swept of your feet, and you never expect infatuation to die out.
Underneath it all, you are scared that you aren't lovable.
Your insecurity has ruined many relationships, as you are unable to see the love that's really there.
You are secretly afraid of being alone. Confronting your insecurities is incredibly painful.
|
Your Nail Polish Color is Pink
|
How you're unique: You're girly without being high maintenance
Why your style rocks: You're the perfect blend of stylish, preppy, and cute
What this color says about you: "I am secure enough not to follow every trend"
|
words written on the fallen leaf
12:16 PM
Thursday, July 12, 2007
What others see from your style
You tend to be a gentle and pleasant person. You love nature and at least some of the arts, and derive great satisfaction from being helpful. You are stubborn and are not interested in wealth and power.
What your nightclothes reveal
You are a sensuous person who can also get bored easily. You're probably a little lazy and like to have your own way.
What others see from your ties
You enjoy being alone. You like to life the simple but good life, and you cherish your freedom. You are thoughtful, confident and uninterested in glamour.
What others see from your belts
You are a frank, assertive and sometimes flamboyant person. You are friendly and want to be accepted by everybody. You like to have fun, to be free, and to live a comfortable lifestyle.
What others see from your shoes
You're very young at heart. You regard freedom highly and don't like to be controlled by a set of rules. You don't like conflict, will compromise wherever possible, and are hardworking people. Occasionally you can become vulnerable when having to face problems, especially emotional ones.
What others see from your earrings
You are probably a free spirit at heart with artistic talent. You are absolutely unique and are always coming up with lots of great ideas. Being happy is your most important goal.
The last analysis
You are probably a romantic and passionate person. You are sensitive and lonely when you aren't in love. You can be somewhat self-centered, but you are honest and sincere to others. You like to make a good impression of yourself and worry about what others think of you.
words written on the fallen leaf
3:48 PM
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Daydreamer
By: Lee Ryan
Young man, got a lot of soul
In God We Trust
He broke the mould with this one
It feels like
There's nowhere left to run
In fact his life has just begun with a dream
And sometimes that's enough
Chorus:
Fly away, drift and glide
Fly away, drift and glide
Daydreamer, what are you dreaming of?
Daydreamer what are you thinking of?
Daydreamer, wanna dream with ya
Leave it all behind
I say, welcome to the dreamtime
Young girl that I used to know
Sung a lullaby and stole the show from everyone
I'll tell ya
Just when she closed her eyes
She saw the world and she fantasied
It was part of her and it was beautiful
(Chorus)
A sworn song for my girl
I love you but I don't know where you are
So long for now
I'll see you in my dreamtime
(Chorus)
_________________________________________________
Thanks for being almost there.
Now I'm going to close the door on us.
words written on the fallen leaf
4:31 PM
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Hey guys, you shouldn't even be here. There is nothing here.
I repeat, do not ever come here again. There is a strange virus attacking whoever who comes here. So stay away from here! Delete my link if you have to.
Left out. That's what I've been feeling these past week. Oh gosh, now I'm going to sound like an emo-freak. That's side effects of watching too much Oprah, I'm telling you. (Now great, I've just become a nutter who's talking to her other "her". I mean "you"....or wait, is it "I"? *throughly confused*)
I don't know why I let it affect me. The fact that they've been going out all week, going to each other's house and playing what-not while I've stuck at home with my computer, TV, mp3 player and Harry Potter And The Order Of Phoenix. (Pretty dreadful companionship, huh). I guess it got to do with the fact that we used to be so close. I mean I accept the fact that people change and friendships change, just that it is still a pretty unresolved issue in my heart. I've tried surrendering this to God and keep telling myself that it doesn't really bother me, but I still bite my lips whenever they blogged about the latest place they go and latest things they do. Or when I'm sitting down there and they just treat the rest of us invisible as they talk about their latest secrets, things the rest of us doesn't have a single clue about (I will rather I do not be with them than to go through that kind of torture.)
You know I've envisioned them in my future 21st birthday party or even my future wedding, all having fun. But now I just don't see them there anymore when I try to imagine my wedding. Scary huh. Friends that you have thought you will share weal and woe even when growing old suddenly become strangers overnight, if not over a long period of time.
It's not a cold shrug-off that I've received. It's not even a torrent of harsh words poured out during a argument. Of course, it's not as dramatic as Harry Potter. But it's a disinterest in my life, a distrust in me, a dislike of being with me and a distance that is happening so slowly that none of us will know until it is over. Except I would have like to be one of those who didn't know.
I wonder what is God trying to say. Is He saying "My dear, all these are temporal. Fix your eyes on Me and I will satisfy you."? Saying "This is to prepare you for better friends coming your way."? Or maybe He is saying "You nutter! You are just over-reacting, over-imagining, over-emotional and over everything! Go and be nice to them and do not be bitter about anything!" (Great Clesias, you've just risen another level of madness -hearing voices that contradict each other.)
Now that my whole social life is in a mess, I'm more worried about starting school. What if I can't fit in? What if I'm doomed to spending school life wandering around school alone? What if I failed to be a good example of Christianity and instead is a fat stumbling block? I haven't even begin to address my fear of failing my exams and waste four years and my parents' money.
And yet I know that God will bring me through. He was the one who convinced my mum (years ago) that she doesn't have to worry because I will surely go to university. And He must be the one who convinced the lady that I signed up for English Lit course when I never ticked English Lit. I may not know what He wants me to do with that path but I trust Him enough to know that it's going to be the best for me.
A friendship that only bubbles over without any real substance maybe wasn't meant to start in the first place?
HEY, WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE?!
words written on the fallen leaf
12:27 AM
Monday, July 09, 2007
Brighten My Heart
By: Sixpence None The Richer
My heart is as dark as the soil sodden with winter rains.
My soul is as heavy as the peat freshly dug from the bog.
My thoughts swirl like willow branches caught in autumn winds.
My body as tense as a cat’s as it stalks it’s prey.
Help me open my heart to you,
Help me open my heart to you,
Help me open my heart to you, oh Jesus.
It’s what I long to do.
My heart is as dark as the soil sodden with winter rains.
(Lord, brighten my heart)
My soul is as heavy as the peat freshly dug from the bog.
(Lord, lighten my soul)
My thoughts swirl like willow branches caught in autumn winds.
(Lord, still my thoughts)
My body as tense as a cat’s as it stalks it’s prey. (Lord, relax my body)
Help me open my heart to you,
Help me open my heart to you,
Help me open my heart to you, oh Jesus.
It’s what I long to do.
words written on the fallen leaf
1:07 PM
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Great! I have successful not update for so long that nobody comes here anymore! Now I can really pour out my feelings. (how many litres, Clesias? Okay, not funny)
Arghhhh...that horrible Mika song that my brother plays 24/7 is really driving me mad. The love of God is preventing me from taking his phone and throwing it out of the window, ten floors down. (P.S: if you see a white Sony Ericson phone broken into pieces outside Blk 849, then you know what happen. Cause human beings have their boundaries, you know.)
Now, what I'm doing is crunchyroll-ing, watching hilarious "Beautiful Cooking", the oh-so-handsome-Raymond-Lam! "La Femme Desperado" and the lame/cliched-storyline-crappy-acting "Heart Of Fencing". What a great social life I have. *sarcastic*
words written on the fallen leaf
11:57 PM
